On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Who died my cat blue again?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize