Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
my liver is dry heaving
Randomize
