you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
