He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
