haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
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