we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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