ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
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