margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
