Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Randomize