operation have a gay friend backfired
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
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