Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
