mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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