I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
