I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
