I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
