I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
