if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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