i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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