doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
