I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
