If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
