I'm jealous of your bromance
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
the raccoons are back...
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