With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Randomize
