All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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