Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize