About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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