Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Randomize
