Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
