I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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