Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
