Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize