thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
