Sacagawea was the original milf.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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