he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Just cropdusted the office
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
