The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
