I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
two words: eviction party
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
