The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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