if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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