Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
