It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
COCAINE IS GR8
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
