I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
