My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
