I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
