it hurts more in the daytime
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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