we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
