So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
