You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
