i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
