Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
wow bdsm is so cute
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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