Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
